Dear Folks ~ Have I ever been surprised and blessed because of a ‘little birdie’ who flew around blogland saying I needed some cheering up this December. Oh my goodness, the kindness of others has brought on some ‘happy tears’, smiles and a heart filled with thanksgiving. Ladies I don’t know and some I do know, have most definitely cheered my heart. Sweet cards and notes of encouragement, gift cards, money and baked goods. I am humbled and blown away at the same time.
For some reason this 6th December since my dear husband went to be with Jesus has been rough. Partly, I think it has to do with I’m getting older, and having to deal with everything here at Plum Cottage by myself, that the two of us always handled as a team, a team that worked wonderfully well together. I have to admit that last evening, after a nice Christmas day of laughter and great food with friends, I laid in bed talking to Jesus. Admitting to him how I felt like ‘screaming’ (this is not how I am normally, but those are the feelings that came out last night), I was loudly screaming in my heart and mind because I am not as strong as I’d like to be and I miss my husband. I talked with Jesus about these true feelings and asked for strength and patience as I live each day that I am blessed with. I am human and I do sometimes get ‘down’, and that’s when I cry out to Jesus to be my strength. I want to be of good courage and not afraid, to keep focused on Him, to do what I can with the physical strength and mental know how that I have.
I have so much to be thankful for, a little house that is paid for, my van is paid for, I’ve food to eat, a comfortable bed, clean water, electricity, my 4 feline girls, gardens full of flowers and weeds. Birds, bees and butterflies that grace my gardens with their presence. On my husband’s birthday I saw a hummingbird two different times sipping nectar from two different flower types. To me that was a little happy blessing. Also, I’m thankful that I’m still able to get out and physically do things. I did lose my job that I’d had for 17 years, (3 years after losing my husband, as my boss sold the business and moved across the state) and I’ve not found other work yet, part-time, to supplement my ss check, but, this is all part of God’s plan for my life. He knows my needs and desires. He blesses me in many ways, and right now at this time, He has blessed me with kindness from others.
I am so looking forward to 2019. I look forward to clearing up the property here at Plum Cottage, to make this little place more of a sanctuary, to living even more simply that I already do and to keep trusting in Jesus to take care of me.
Life is an adventure. We can choose which way we want to live it, joyfully and peacefully or gloomily and not at peace. We learn and we grow through life’s experiences. As I am typing this, another little song came to mind. Here are the words:
They that wait upon the Lord,
Shall renew their strength,
They shall mount up with wings as eagles
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.
Teach me Lord, teach me Lord, to wait.
Amen.
*************
Thank you all who have visited here since I started this blog in 2008. Your words of encouragement, your comments, prayers, all that you are and share, has been a blessing in my life. May we have many more years together.
May we all be blessed and may we bless others in 2019.
FlowerLady
26 comments:
Dear Lorraine, I love how you talk to Jesus, I do that too. He is a perfect helper for us widows and I very much relate to how at times it seems overwhelming. Counting your blessings and asking for His help is a good way forward. Hugs from California.
Things are tougher when you are alone. The memories are great but they can’t comfort if you can’t talk to someone about them. I am glad that friends out there did send well wishes and things to help you finishing of December. I too suffer through December 4 alone as my losing of my first wife is not anything that I can share with people. It was 38 years ago and no person around know and understand how difficult that it all was. I am happily married again, the two boys have grown up 38 years beyond that trim and they didn’t have to go through any real loss because they were so young. Anyway, I know that we are better people because we do care about the happenings rather than being living on in disrespect of our past loved ones. I will always remember and so will you. God does supply the comfort after we get through the pain of the moment. Do take care.
It is so good to hear that others have ben a blessing to you.I thought that I had gotten past the sadness and loneliness but this past month has been a hard one for me as well. Christmas has been good and most people would never have known how sad I really felt.I have a hard time being open about that to most people, but I know you understand.
Hugs and , yes lets meet here in bogland for a long time to come.
I love your attitude, Rainey! Keep looking up! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you!
Lorraine,
Glad you can let your feelings out and not suck them down. When you lose someone so special like your hubby you lose a part of yourself too. So having a strong faith is what is getting you through these hard times as well as blessing you with good times. It is hard to keep a home up alone and on a fixed income. Just know God is there and will provide for you. I am keeping you in my prayers. May the new year bring you more blessings.
Hugs,
Kris
I can so relate to how you feel. Through all the sadness, this has been an incredible year. I've never seen so much kindnes. I'm happy that you are experiencing it as well. It really does warm your heart.
One has to love a little birdie... I understand so much of what you are saying. To be alone and dealing with the troubles that come with home ownership, cars, life...it can be overwhelming. It is wonderful that you have a relationship with your Heavenly Father and can have those honest talks with Him. Isaiah 54:5 has always comforted me (even though I know it was written for Israel). Many blessings...
Rainey, you are an amazing person. I wish many blessings for you in the future. Your heart is open and you receive them so humbly. You are inspiration for us all.
xx, Carol
Bless your little "birdie" for her love, care and concern for you.
When I found you in our amazing blogging community it was just before dad went home to be with the Lord, and now living life with my dear mom as a widow herself, I find great inspiration and encouragement through YOU here on your sweet blog.
When I read your postings, especially those when you share about your attitude, strength, sadness, joy, perseverance and your relationship with Jesus, it blesses my heart and I share YOU with mom.
Mom does not read blogs, but I love sharing you and your journey as a widow, because I believe you are real and transparent and that, my dear friend, is an inspiration to all of us!
My life is sweeter and richer having found you here in our blogging community. :-)
I have so enjoyed reading this joyous posting, to God be the glory!
Have a most beautiful and blessed day~
David is one of my favorite Bible characters. He is so real and open and honest in his pain and confusion in the psalms, and God calls him a "man after His own heart." That encourages me to know that it is okay with our Father to vent and cry out to Him. Love to you, and yes, may we enjoy many more years of blogging friendships. xo Deborah
You're such a strong and sweet woman, Lorraine - you inspire people to cheer you on when you're feeling blue. I hope 2019 is a wonderful year for you! xoxo
Lorraine, how nice that so many thought about you and cheered you up on Christmas. You are such a nice person. It's easy to see why so many do care. Love, Henny
Dropping by your blog for the first time. Hoping you know that this post left a positive imprint on my heart. As you read on my blog, I almost lost my husband this year (diagnosed with terminal cancer June 6th with no hope of recovery by a first and second opinion doctor and then declared recovered on Dec 19th) and I can only imagine how your life must've lost its way when you lost your hubby. Hoping 2019 is the year of Joy and fulfillment.
Keep on keepin' on! Philip/MN
Lorraine, wondering if you have heard anything from GLD (Living & Gardening in the Ozarks). I asked Jean (Seedscatterer) on Facebook if she had heard from her & she said no. I just hate when someone whose blog I read just stops all of a sudden with no word about it.
Dearest Rainey, I'm sending hugs and much, much love. Things here have been beyond ridiculous again and I've been missing out on visiting with my dear friends. You've been an inspiration to me, much more than you know, and a constant reminder to cherish my time together with my husband for it is a blessing. Not many people are blessed to have a love so strong as you shared with your DH and his loss is and was a huge burden to bear. Sending you all love and best wishes for 2019, thank you for being my dear friend!
It's so good that we have a God who listens to his children and is okay with the truth of what is happening with our feelings. May God bless you and keep you and make His face shine upon you in 2019!
May your new year be filled with peace and lovely blessings. I often read your posts and you are a delight and bring joy to my mornings. You are always in my daily prayers.
Dear Rainey, Your words brought tears to my eyes. I love you and pray for you often. God bless you in 2019!!! {{hugs}}
You are such an inspiration to me, Lorraine - so sweet, yet so honest and strong. I love your faith and willingness to keep your heart open despite all that you have been through, and your sense of gratitude no matter what. I hope your new year is full of sweet blessings. Sending hugs xx Karen
How wonderful that you were gifted with cards and gifts from all over Blogland! What a blessing. It is OK to yell out to God - he can take it! I frequently tell Brian that there is no way I can stay in this house alone if he goes before me. There is way too much upkeep and I know I couldn't handle it by myself. You are doing great! Much love and many blessings to you for 2019. {{hugs}}
Happy New Year my dear friend! Mark would be so proud of you!! You are continuing on your dream. You are never alone. Love, KK
I'm glad to know that you were covered with kindness by others. It was particularly nice to read about your conversation with the Lord. He knows your heart and He is able. May 2019 bring you new joys and adventures... and blessings.
Just stopping by to wish you a blessed and happy New Year!
Sorry to have missed out on being part of the blessing! Just now catching up on my blog reading. I'm thankful to read your honest feelings re. life's hard situations. God IS faithful. His answers and provisions are meted out in HIS time-- not always ours. Your posts remind me of this. Thank you. ❤️
So thankful to read of the beautiful blessings that came your way to encourage and lift your heart up Lorraine! Talking to Jesus helps so very much, and He is always faithful to provide strength when we think we can't go on. Praying that this year the Lord brings comfort to your heart in continued wings of blessings. Much love to you sweet friend!
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