When I’m 64 …

 

Will you still need me,

Will you still feed me,

When I’m 64.

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The answer is yes.

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I still needed you

I still fed you

When you were 64.

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Now, at 64 and your widow, 

I miss you my dear husband Mark, very much, every single day.

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This morning I felt energized after hearing a tune by Tom Petty (below), and had already decided that I wanted to get out and trim the driveway of overhang and stuff spreading out into it.  So, out I went. gathered my tools and got going.  I even did the huge schefflera at the corner. And when I did that I was thrilled.  I used the little tree say that DH had bought me a few years back and when the largest section fell to the ground I punched my arm into the air and said ‘yes, I did it.’ 

Grief has a way of making you feel so down and helpless. You have lost the other half of yourself, you don’t see how you can go on without them beside you.  But, as a believer in Jesus/God, I know I can go on and am going on with His love and strength.  My dear husband is with me too, I just can’t see him, or feel him, or hug and kiss him, but he is still a very large part of my life. God brought us together, and we are only temporarily separated. I still wear my wedding ring, I still feel married. I love Mark more and more with each passing day.

God is drawing me closer to Him in my grief, and my love for Him is growing stronger and I am thankful for all of His many blessings.

I am a believer in God who loves and enjoys rock-n-roll, the blues, and more. We loved lots of different kinds of music. Music spoke to our hearts and souls. This morning when I came across “I Won’t Back Down” by Tom Petty, I was reminded me of Mark and I am so glad he always stood for truth, and spoke what he felt and thought.

The guitar music in these tunes reminds me of Mark’s playing his guitar.

He played the drums and bass guitar when we first met,  then played acoustic while we lived in Spain and got an electric guitar after we came back home to the states. He also played harmonica. Through the years we had our own jam sessions right here in our little cottage with guitar, harmonica, and I played a Melodia piano, a tiny keyboard that you blow into, and a little on harmonica too, plus another keyboard, I also sang. I miss those times, but the wonderful, fun memories are locked in my heart. We will make sweet music again one day in the ‘huge jam session in the sky’.

Here are some more tunes if you care to listen, if not just pass them by.

I Shot the Sheriff by Eric Clapton.

A real favorite of DH.

I heard this song soon after Mark left this planet and it touched my heart deeply, tears were streaming as I was driving down the road. It is called ‘Even If’~ by Kutless, a Christian group.

Here is a favorite of ours, which I will close this music portion with.

‘Somewhere in heaven’ by Carlos Santana.

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is Forever

Never take a day or your love for granted.

FlowerLady