Yesterday was another emotional day. My stomach was in knots, because of fear of taking care of something I’d not done before, TAXES. Tears fell because of missing my husband, but there was also laughter and a great sense of accomplishment, with the help of my BIL, my husband’s brother.
I had bought the H&R Block tax program, and my BIL volunteered to help me and I was/am ever thankful. Looking at the forms from last year a week or two ago, in my husband’s computer, brought me to tears as it was all ‘Greek’ to me. My BIL said it wasn’t going to be as bad as I thought, and he was right, it wasn’t. It took awhile, but the deed was accomplished and I mailed in the forms today. Hurray!!!
That was the first of my firsts, the other was having to check the box saying I was a widow. That really hurt, and I had to do it twice in the forms. Sigh! There’s no getting around it, it’s not my choice, but, it is what it is.
I am so glad taxes are out of the way. They were a scary burden, next year won’t be so bad, I hope. The program was really very good, easily understood.
I made home made pizza, Italian sausage, which we enjoyed and sent home half of it for BIL to share with dear SIL. They live about an hour north, and I appreciate their giving up their time together to help me with this.
I now can relax and start doing some things I’d like to do around here. One step at a time. My dear husband would want me to get back to my happy, positive self, and I do have times where I feel that way, then WHAM, I get blasted by the ‘grief monster’. I just let the tears flow and feel better afterwards. Dear Mark is just on the other side of the veil, cheering me on.
After dropping the forms off at the P.O. this morning, I went to Home Depot for a new garden hose and nozzle, the old hose had sprung a leak and more looked like they were going to happen, the nozzle had problems too. The hose went into the trash, and the old brass nozzle is going into the save pile as it has scrap value.
Here are some photos taken last week, of two roses I bought recently. The top one is ‘Granada’, the bottom one is unknown as it didn’t have a name tag. Unfortunately, both look like they have powdery mildew, something I’ve not had before and I would like to control it naturally. I bought them from two different places. So, if any of you rose growers have suggestions, please let me know. I would greatly appreciate it.
These roses are in the secret garden and it smells wonderful back there, along with the gardenia that keeps putting out blooms, and the rose Maman Cochet is blooming as well, and the Confederate Jasmine has just started blooming also. That is a scent I look forward to every spring. A nice potpourri of floral scents.
Granada is a beautiful, ancient city in Spain. We loved it and this rose is beautiful and the scent, spicy and rosy at the same time.
This rose is not only beautiful in color but the scent is a deep rose and just wonderful.
***
Fear is the mind killer
It will pass
But I shall remain.
A portion I remember from the first book in the ‘Dune Trilogy’.
***
May your fears be surmountable,
may your days be filled with
bits of joy and beauty.
May you learn as you grow,
in each new day that you are blessed with.
FlowerLady
21 comments:
I admire you for working through the tears, accomplishing doing your taxes with kind help from BIL, and seeing the powerful beauty of the pink roses. One step at a time, dear friend.
A neighbor was here for a few minutes, a lady in her 50's also widowed. She spke briefly of some of the stress she faces on her own. She stated, "I know Jesus is at my back, but sometimes I long for someone tanigible, visible."
So many people are lonely and struggling to do things 'on their own'--married or otherwise, we can be thankful for those that reach out to help in whatever small or larger ways that are open to them.
As always, your roses are a delight.
Trying to recall what I tried when some potted rosemary developed mildew: I think I pruned heavily then sprayed with a vinegar/water mixture.
If you find a useful rememdy, don't forget to share it with us.
Ah Rainey, you have jumped another hurdle... I really hate tax time too, it stresses me out every year and every years I say I will be more organized and it never happens... your new roses are just beautiful, I wish I had time to tend to roses as the ones I've had have never survived. Cheers~
Way to go girl! I am loving your roses. I can't wait for mine to start blooming and throwing their lovely scent into the air. Have a good week friend. Love, Kit
Taxes--uh! Not a fun project in the least. I'm so glad you had your brother in law to help you. What a blessing he is. Checking "widow" would be SO hard. And those waves of agony that come over you, I hope and pray you feel Mark's presence in these times. And also the presence of the Lord. Your roses are beautiful. I think baking soda and water are supposed to help with mildew but don't quote me on that. Good luck with them.
Gorgeous roses!
Taxes. Bleah. I'm all for doing my share. The process seems to be such a pain though and it keeps changing. Glad you got that done OK.
We suffered an unexpected loss this past week (my father-in-law). . . it's tough watching DH go through the grieving process.
Reading your post reminded me that I have yet to file my taxes. We always owe so I wait until the last minute. But I've got them all processed and ready to submit electronically so it's just a push of a button.
Beautiful roses ~ as always.
Hugs,
eli
Both roses are gorgeous.This is my very favourite flower and pink is right up there in my favourite list of colours. Doing something new is hard,I do understand. It has been over two years for me and today I bought a different car,At first I was excited and later broke down in tears,hoping I had done the right thing.This going it alone is no fun.
What beautiful Roses. It always makes me want more, but when I prune what I have, as I did the other day, I say my four are enough. :)
Cher Sunray Gardens
Good for you for getting those taxes done. I am glad you had your BIL to help you this first time. I tried a new free online program this yer called TaxAct and it worked beautifully even for my complicated farm report. I haven't sent it in yet since I have to pay but will shortly.
The roses are beautiful as always.
Well done on another of your many firsts.As for the mildew,it is normally when the roots of the rose have been too dry.So make sure the rose gets watered well,remove badly effected leaves and we would use a Bordeaux mixture here.I put banana skins at the base of my roses as they are high in potassium and are a great pick me up.
I pray for the day that you can wake up and not have any surprises such as taxes to deal with. You are growing stronger each day and I admire you sharing your stories with us.
Your roses are beautiful and I wish I could help you with the mildew issue but I have no clue about rose mildew. I only wish I had paid better attention when in the Rose Garden with my grandmother as she had the most beautiful roses. I avoided them due to their thorns and now have regrets. I have collected a couple of Knockouts in her honor though.
I can hardly wait for the jasmine to bloom here! It fills the air with its sweet scent and makes me smile while out playing in the gardens. Ah, I just love Spring...
I can only imagine all the very emotional, and many first of the first year. I think it's okay and only natural to feel all that, and to let the tears fall. I can only say, that I am glad you are surround with so much beauty, and love that you and your husband worked towards. So many beautiful memories of you two, and your life together.
Hi FL, I married my tax preparer. When I found out he taught statistics in college I knew he was the one for me! You see I flunked every math class in HS at least once! So I would be totally paying to get my taxes done if The Herbal Husband was gone from the planet. Love your roses! Hanging in there. Hopefully, you got a refund that you can spend on yourself. xxoo LVL and The Herbal Husband
I've been there too Lorraine over the taxes and understanding all of the finances.
Your Roses are so exquisite and I can smell the gorgeous perfume if I close my eyes for a minute.
A friend of mine throws a bucket full of the dish washing water over her rose foliage. I suppose the same would be to mix a squirt of dishwashing liquid in a bucket of water. Also over here all of our washing liquids (kitchen or laundry) are phosphate free.
Congrats on tackling the taxes. I just did ours as well as our sons' and I'm so happy to have it be hing me. I use Turbo tax and file online for the speed of it. Love the rose pictures.
Dealing with roses is certainly more pleasant than doing taxes! But you did it! Congratyulations!
....
Lorraine, I just finished reading 'Proof of Heaven' by Dr.Eben Alexander. I think you would enjoy it...
Taxes are scary. We usually use a CPA but didn't get them in to him early enough so we decided to do them ourselves, using last year's as a guide. We couldn't find where he put some of our expenses at all and kind of wondered if he just skipped them. I need to get them to the P.O. today and then I can breathe a sigh of relief too.
I love your roses. Your photos are so perfect, and I can imagine the smell in your garden! I'm no help with your mildew though as I have never grown any. I've killed a couple though. In fact, I was going to ask you if you have any Knock out roses. I thought I might give those a try.
Rainey, I'm so glad the taxes went well. I have to get our sons to complete theirs, as time grows short.
I hate the process, too, I don't know why, as the 'box' makes it fairly easy. I guess it's just the fear I've missed something. Good for you, I am so happy this hurdle has been cleared.
The roses are beautiful... I could almost smell them.
Hi Sis! As always your flowers are beautiful, I can almost smell them. I'm so proud of you for getting you taxes done, I've been doing ours for probably 30 years now, they have gotten easier this year since V retired, don't have all the self-employed forms to do, they were very confusing.
My Jasmine is putting on new blooms, can't wait, they smell sooo good and fill my whole front patio and porch with their fragrance. I used to have a beautiful rose garden but lately haven't had much luck with them, they take alot of work and I kind of neglect them. Shame on me.
Once again I hope ou have a wonderful day. Love you much!
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